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Marriage Preparation Steps
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Congratulations on Your Engagement!
It is wonderful that you have recognized God’s call for the two of you to walk through life together toward God! The whole Church is glad and made stronger by the gift of your love in God to each other and to the world. The Church wants your marriage to be wildly successful. It is here to support you throughout your marriage
4 Steps In the Marriage Preparation Experience
Click here for a PDF handout with this information.
If you're on this page you've probably already spoken to the priest or deacon who will be officiating your wedding and he directed you here, but if you found your way here before talking to a priest or deacon the first step is to:
1. Meet With Your Pastor
All engaged couples are required to receive a sacramental preparation and must meet with their priest/deacon at least six months (or more) prior to the desired wedding date. This marriage preparation process consists of Four Phases. Initial Contact with Priest/Deacon will:- Establish rapport with you in order to support and counsel you at this most important time in your life.
- Examine your motives for marriage.
- Explore any special circumstances that may affect marriage, e.g., age, cultural background, pregnancy, military service, physical or emotional problems, levels of faith and religious issues.
- Explain the Marriage Preparation process.
- Obtain personal information, explain what other documentation is needed, and determine whether any dispensations or permissions will be necessary.
2. FOCCUS Marriage Inventory
Assessment Process with Priest/Deacon will:- Administer a PREMARITAL INSTRUMENT* to assist in beginning the assessment of your readiness to marry.
- Discuss the results of the FOCCUS instrument.
- Discuss the strengths and weaknesses of your communication process.
- Examine the sacramental aspects of your human covenant.
- Assess your readiness for marriage and complete the Prenuptial Questionnaire.
- Begin the liturgical wedding plans and present to you the parish guidelines. Inform you of the cost and suggested offering.
*A premarital inventory is a tool designed to help you assess your readiness for marriage. It is not a pass/fail indicator. Instead, it is meant to help you discover more about yourselves and each other in a non-threatening and objective way. Our diocese utilizes the FOCCUS (Facilitating Open Couple Communication Understanding and Study) instrument to help you identify issues that need to be discussed, reflected on, understood, studied for problem-solving, skill-building and decision-making. Your priest/deacon will give you more information at your initial meeting.3. Required Formation in Preparation for a Sacramental Marriage
Proper and effective preparation is essential to ensure successful and lasting marriages. Below are listed four options available to couples preparing for marriage approved by the Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux.
MENTOR CENTERED PROGRAMS | Relationship-focused marriage preparation programs are the ideal option for marriage preparation. This is because they provide a personalized, relational approach, and they have the potential of fostering long-term relationships between couples who can support and help each other as they encounter challenges throughout their lives and do not limit support to the time prior to marriage.
1. Witness to Love - This mentor-based program is offered in some parishes in our diocese and we believe it to be, while not perfect, the most effective marriage preparation program available today. Ask your parish if this option is available to you, or for more details, go to https://witnesstolove.org/ If you are a parish or pastor interested in starting a Witness to Love Program, contact your Parish Liaison.
2. Catholic Marriage Prep Online - With the recent COVID restrictions, more and more couples have been directed to Catholic Marriage Prep Online. Unlike other online marriage prep programs, which require a couple to watch a series of videos and discuss the content amongst themselves before obtaining a certificate of completion, Catholic Marriage Prep Online connects engaged couples with a mentor couple that assists them in the process of preparing for marriage. Mentor Couples engage with engaged couples for nine sessions covering both the theology of marriage and the practical skills needed for successful marriages. For details or to register go to https://catholicmarriageprep.com/
NON-MENTOR CENTERED OPTIONS | Two other diocesan approved options for marriage preparation are the [ENGAGED] course hosted by Paul and Gretchen George of Discover the Art of Living, and the Catholic Engaged Encounter Retreat which are both intended to supplement a broader marriage preparation process facilitated by either the pastor or deacon officiating the wedding or their designated representative. Information about both options can be found here:
1. ENGAGED Course- Registration and more information can be found at
http://discovertheartofliving.com/engaged. This is a combination of a video course and a live processing discussion over Zoom with Paul and Gretchen George. After registering, you will take the video course on your own and schedule a personal Zoom call with the George’s.4. Continue Meeting to Finalize Requirements and Discuss Wedding Liturgy
Completion of Marriage Prep Process with Priest/Deacon will:- Discuss what you have learned and experienced at your formal marriage preparation program.
- Discuss your understanding of sacrament in light of your formal marriage preparation.
- Discuss your responsibilities as members of God's people, as spouses and future parents.
- Complete all documentary requirements. As appropriate, grant permission for mixed marriage and/or apply for appropriate permissions or dispensations.
- Discuss the reception of Penance and Holy Eucharist as a fitting preparation for the sacrament of Matrimony.
- Finalize the wedding liturgy and discuss the wedding rehearsal.
For additional questions about the Marriage Prep Process please contact David Dawson at 985-850-3130 or ddawson@htdiocese.org or click on the link on the menu to the left "Marriage Prep Policy/Guidelines"